Alright, alright I totally suck. I hate everything right now...food especially. I feel like a freakin' eating disorder patient or something. I hate chocolate, I hate pizza, I hate donuts. Blah! Working around that shit sucks! It's so damn tempting and once I have a little bit I can't stop. It's gross. I pretty much feel obsessed with food right now. That's almost all I think about. I would like to blame everything on stress, but know that it's not true. I make my own choices and stress is no excuse. I feel totally stupid, but I know that I am stronger than food and I don't need sugary crap to live. I need fresh, living foods to live. And yeah a lot of people probably think I'm some crazy health foodist, but whatever. I'm sick of feeling sick and I am doing my best to change that. I think food is probably the most addicting thing out there. Now, I've never tried heroin or anything, but I'll bet sugar and additives are just as hard to get off of as drugs are. It's all a mind thing really. I know that one day that switch will turn in my head when I FINALLY fully commit to a sustainable lifestyle that is free of chemicals and the dependency of all these outside things that so many people cling to, but until that day I just gotta keep getting up and working my hardest. And, yes...I am a crazy health nut. And guess what, it will pay in the long run! ; p
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